No need to watch the Masters later today.  Tiger already won. They decided that he should be given the tournament because he is, after all, Tiger Woods, and can you imagine the ratings next year?

Of course, Nick Faldo will be back in the booth because he dutifully recanted any and all remarks about the Masters’ transgressions.  It wasn’t really him calling for Tiger to withdraw, it was a misinformed version of him.  The information he didn’t have at the time of his remark was that he was going to get fired – that changed everything. Pathetic.  And he was one of my all-time favorites.

While a 14 year old can get hammered for taking more than 40 seconds to hit a shot during a five and half hour crawl, Tiger gets a free pass on being DQ’d because he may have been confused.  Anyone who has played competitive golf for 20 weeks knows you drop as near as possible when you choose to hit from the spot you hit your last shot.  You’d think that after 20 years of competitive golf that Tiger would have that one down.  Of course if you can have a boulder removed from your path as a ‘movable’ obstruction, this is but a mere trifle.

Anyone who has ever played competitive golf knows full well that signing an incorrect scorecard is an immediate DQ.  No reprieve, ever.  This is the first time in the history of competitive golf that someone signing an incorrect scorecard was not DQ’d.  But there were extenuating circumstances – it was Tiger Woods and this is the Masters.

And please spare me the two stroke penalty bullshit.  It means nothing.  He got a pass on being DQ’d that is completely unwarranted whether anyone had looked at the tape prior to the end of his round or not.  He signed the wrong scorecard, and, in competitive golf, you are DQ’d.  Whether it is the Monday scratch tournament at Crag Burn or the US Open, you are DQ’d.

Anyone who holds their ground that this self-absorbed myopic asshole should have been DQ’d will certainly be ostracized from the Tiger Woods/Nike world of sycophants and the hallowed grounds of golf’s Sistine Chapel, Augusta National.  So it goes.

And, yes, Steve Jobs was a great man too [as long as you consider a lying manipulative coercive cheating exploitive sociopath a great man].  Read it enough and you’ll believe anything.